Mink Chocolates is coming up on its sixth year anniversary. Not a week goes by without us hearing from someone that, had it not been for insert name of person here bringing our chocolate to insert name of event here they never would have known we exist. 

This is not surprising given that, as a general rule, we don’t advertise in conventional channels. Our marketing dollars, for instance, support a robust program of community sponsorship through our Mink Cares initiatives, but otherwise, we rely on word of mouth. 

Lately I’ve been thinking it may be time to jump on the celebrity endorsement bandwagon. Here are my top picks for potential spokespeople: 

The Pope 

Now that he and his giant hat are retired, he may want to supplement his pension with a little something less onerous than his papal duties ever were. If I can convince him not to encourage the worlds one billion Catholics to give up chocolate for Lent, the advantages for him are plenty. He doesn’t have to clear it first with Mrs. Pope. The dress code is casual, he can work in his robe. The hours are sensible, no more midnight mass all-nighters. And most importantly, it’s an easy commute now that Virgin Atlantic flies into Vancouver. 

Pamela Anderson 

She’s Canadian, and may not be as averse to working in Canadian dollars as other celebrity endorsers. She needs the money, having just listed her house in Malibu for sale as part of a strategy to generate cash to pay a tax bill. Granted, she may skew more male in her demographic reach, but when she fills out an “I Eat Mink” t-shirt, she won’t raise the ire of PETA or alienate any of her vegetarian friends. 

Christie Clark 

Conventional wisdom has it that the current premier of British Columbia will be looking for work after the provincial election in May. In the same way that Glen Clark’s career was resurrected by going to work for Jim Pattison in the private sector after his sudden resignation from politics a decade and a half ago, capitalizing on her previous stint at CKNW and becoming a radio pitchman for a small local business might be a worthwhile entry point back into the real world for Ms. Clark. It might be necessary, however, to run a few focus groups and do some polling first. 

My Buddy Fred 

Because Lance and Tiger have lost their credibility, Chumlee’s loveable but not exactly a role model and William Shatner is over-exposed. Fred’s in the fashion business, and has been known to hang with hipsters. He has that sort of je ne sais quoi and quirky sense of humor that helped land Seth MacFarlane the Oscars hosting gig, without the misogyny and sexism that will unland him any chance of future Oscar hosting gigs. And if I was a gambling man, which I am, I’d venture to say he’d work for chocolate, which is about the extent of this year’s advertising budget. 

Marc Lieberman

Mink Chocolates Inc.,
Mink A Chocolate Cafe Ltd. 

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